Nashua Legal Issues Blog

Co-parenting can be both stressful and challenging, especially if you and your ex aren't seeing eye to eye on how you should raise your children.

While disagreements are likely to happen, there are steps you can take to co-parent with a higher level of success:

• Don't make it all about you: The key to co-parenting success is putting your children's wants and needs above your own. If you can get your ex to do the same, you're in a position to achieve your goals.
• Keep a flexible schedule: You have a parenting and visitation agreement to guide your schedule, but life can get in the way. And when it does, it's your flexibility that will help keep things on track.
• Stay out of the way: When your children are with your ex, keep your distance. Don't call them constantly, send text messages or arrive early to pick them up. When you respect your ex's time, they'll hopefully do the same.
• Communicate efficiently with your ex: Do your best to find a method of communication that works for both of you. For some, face-to-face communication is best. For others, email or text messaging makes life easier.
• Choose your battles wisely: If you want to argue with your ex, you won't have to search far to find something that aggravates you. It's okay to stand your ground, but choose your battles wisely. There are times when it's best to keep quiet and walk away.

No matter how much credit card debt you have, your issuer expects that you'll eventually pay it off. However, there may come a point when you realize that you don't have the financial means for doing so.

There is no guarantee of success, but you can attempt to negotiate credit card debt with your issuer. Here are some of the options to consider:

• Modification: Your issuer can modify your account in many ways, such as by removing late fees, lowering your interest rate or reducing your monthly minimum payment.
• Lump sum settlement: With this option, you offer your issuer a lump sum of money in exchange for writing off the rest of your debt. For this to work, it's essential to make a reasonable offer.
• Hardship plan: This comes into play if you can prove to your issuer that a financial hardship is making it difficult to stay current. For example, unemployment or a serious illness may qualify you for a hardship plan.
• Debt consolidation: For example, if you have more than one credit card with a balance, you can use a balance transfer credit card to consolidate all your debt. This may be something your current issuer can assist you with.

The strong, even overwhelming emotions that you experience in a divorce can push you to say things that you would otherwise never verbalize, and the same is probably true for your spouse. Frustration over the situation and a desire to feel validated and heard can lead people to say things to their ex that they later come to regret.

While it may be true that you no longer have to worry about preserving your relationship with your ex, you may still need to spend quite a bit of time with them in the future. Especially if you share children, you need to prepare for the possibility of an ongoing relationship long after you divorce. You don't want something you say in the heat of the moment to impact your ability to co-parent.

As you go through divorce, you realize that your financial situation is taking many twists and turns. For example, you'll no longer have two salaries to rely on, so it's critical to adjust your spending.

Here are five tips you can follow to create a post-divorce budget:

• List your future income and expenses: Forget about how much your family was earning and spending in the past. Post-divorce, it's all about your income and expenses.
• Track your spending: It's a must to understand exactly where your money is going, as this allows you to cut back in the appropriate ways.
• Put pen to paper: A budget in your head isn't a budget at all. Use pen and paper or a spreadsheet on your computer to create a budget and track your income and expenses. This is the best way to organize your budget, which helps prevent mistakes.
• Review it once a month: Don't assume that the first budget you create post-divorce is the one you'll follow forever. Review it regularly -- at least once a month -- to determine if changes are necessary.
• Don't forget to save: Don't focus so much time on your income and expenses that you overlook the importance of saving. Get into the habit of paying yourself first.