For some married couples facing divorce, the narcissism of the other spouse is too much to handle. What might have initially attracted you in the beginning is now the very thing that repels you from him or her. Narcissism can be explained as an overabundance of self-interest, both physically and through external symbols of achievement.
Perhaps you were drawn to her beauty and how she prioritized her self-care practices. Maybe you considered his external gains as a manifestation of his power and importance. However, the lure of these traits may lead to a darker place after you get to know a person through the intimacy of marriage.
Divorcing with a child caught in the middle of a custody battle may become more difficult when the spouse you’re contending with is a narcissist. So, what do you do? Here are some tips to navigate the custody process when dealing with a narcissist.
Keep good records - Narcissists are prone to inflating the truth. You know your spouse and how he or she will attempt to personify themselves as the “angel” and cast you as the “devil” before the court. Therefore, maintaining good records and documents on all matters related to your case is important. This includes videos, screenshots, photos, recordings, paperwork and more.
Lock up your evidence – Narcissists are willing to go to great lengths to sell their story. This includes taking your recorded information and destroying it or using it against you. Whatever you collect to help you in your custody case, keep these items securely private and out of access for your soon-to-be ex-spouse.
Communicate with family/friends – Keep your loved ones educated on what is going on in your custody battle for the simple fact that you need support against your partners schemes. Narcissists have no respect for boundaries and may try to get what they want through the paths of relationships closest to you. They will usually manipulate, trick, coerce and bully their way into your closest circle for whatever trap they are trying to set.
If you recognize that your spouse is a narcissist, it is important to manage the legal game board strategically. Hiring an attorney is crucial to protecting you from the high-levels of abuse that narcissists use during court battles. Narcissists do not hold back in making false accusations against you. If you maintain consistency in your behavior, good records and composure during court meetings, you have a chance at winning a battle against a narcissistic parent.