When your children are sitting around the dinner table many years from now, do you want them to remember your divorce as a torrid time or one that you handled with grace and dignity with their best interests at heart?
Making divorce easy for your kids might be unrealistic, but you can make it less traumatic. Here are a few things that you can do in your pursuit of that noble goal.
1. Make time to be with them and answer their questions
“Mommy, where will Billy live?” The domestic status of your son’s goldfish might not be high on your list of priorities in the middle of a divorce, yet it’s clearly important to your son. Taking the time to answer such questions rather than responding that you have far more important things to think about right now will be remembered. As will the fact that you still snuggled up on the sofa with them and watched Saturday morning cartoons together just as you have always done.
2. Remain civil with their other parent
However much you currently feel that your spouse is a lying little cheat, they are still your child’s other parent. Your child needs to feel free to show them affection and spend time with them without fearing it will upset you. This is going to be much harder if you are constantly muttering about how much you despise your spouse or what you’d like to do to them with your garden trowel.
3. Work with your spouse to reach a fair custody settlement
Your child will likely not thank you for going all out to get as much custody time as possible at the expense of your spouse. They might even hold it against you if it harms their relationship with their other parent. Unless, of course, you are trying to protect them from abuse.
Consider seeking legal guidance to help you make choices your children will thank you for long after you divorce.
